What Does Having Affair Mean

Many people who have concern wonder "What does having an affair mean?" If there is no sexual intimacy is it cheating? If I flirt does it mean I am unfaithful? Is an emotional affair really cheating? What about sexual conversations online, is that infidelity?

There are so many gray areas that it is often hard to determine whether infidelity is occuring in your marriage or relationship.

So we must go back to the original question...

What does having an affair mean?

Sometimes people start to distance themselves from their spouse due to unhappiness with the relationship and an inability to express their hurt and needs. One way one might due this is to look for another person to fill their unmet needs. It may be through online chats, a coworker at the office, or someone they met be happenstance.

The bottom line is having an affair is not just about sex. To me, what it means is one person is going outside of their significant relationship to look for things they should be getting from their partner. Whether you are looking for emotional support, affection, approval, or sex, you are still searching outside of your marriage or relationship for the things you should be getting from it.

Whether it is you doing the looking, or concerns about your mate, you should consider that there are serious problems in your relationship that need tending to.

Hi, my name is Melanie Cohn and I have been counseling individuals and couples who are dealing with infidelity for 16+ years. If you are having relationship problems and live in the Detroit area click here to learn more about myself, my practice, and how to contact me.

back to top of page: what does having affair mean